So Many Blessings

Happy Thursday to all!

I hope that today you enjoy the LIFE that God has placed before you as it is such a wonderful BLESSING!

Today is a BEAUTIFUL day and I have promised myself that today I will make the best out of every obstacle that I face. Why you might ask, what is so special about today? Well, for starter's, God seen it fit to breathe the breath of life into my body this morning, He has allowed me the blessing to rise and walk in His presence another day! Thank you Jesus for your unconditional LOVE, your GRACE and your Mercy!

This afternoon I headed outside for my walk, one that I haven't taken since this past Sunday afternoon. I just had no energy this week and I started back to work on a part time basis on Monday morning, I have to tell you that after being off for nearly 5 weeks and having my strength and stamina taken away from me do to the surgery, it was very draining and after working a full day, all I wanted to do was sleep.

As I headed down the street, an unusual path for me as I usually start up the street, I walked upon two wonderful neighbors, one that has been a source of encouragement and prayer and the other that I had no idea she knew of my JOURNEY, but so thankful to find out that she has been following the blog and praying on my behalf. Actually, she is the inspiration to sit down today and update the blog. Why, you ask?, well, she told me that she looks forward to reading my updates and listening to the music, and that she has missed getting my updates. God sure has a way of speaking to you through others! Cindy, thank you for speaking those few simple words to me!! Gretchen, thank you, you are such an inspiration and a wonderful source of encouragement! Big Hugs to both of you!!

So, it has been awhile since I last updated and so many things have taken place, so, I will begin to share....

The past two weeks have been tiring as well as amazing! During this time I have battled with bronchitis, sinus infection and to say the least, very weak and drained as I have had no desire to do anything but lay in bed, sleep and watch TV!

There were a few days that I just wanted God to take me home as I was so tired of being sick and tired. One particular day I decided to get up and take a shower, let me tell you, it was a huge effort just to get out of bed and turn on the water as I was very weak and displaced. I took that shower, but I had something to happen to me while taking that shower that literally scared me to a point of almost dialing 9-1-1 to get help, but I was too embarrassed to make the call, so I prayed as I held myself up by the shower walls. Within 20 minutes, I felt like the enemy had been removed from my inner being and there was nothing more that he could do to me on that day to make life so miserable. One BLESSING to speak of... I asked God to remove whatever it was that had me in that position while taking my shower, and He did just that, once again, He has proven to me that He will never leave my side during my JOURNEY!

It has taken me most of two weeks to get over the illness, but thankfully, I am getting stronger everyday and I finally feel like things are turning around for the better! YAY!!

As I look back over the past five weeks, I am so amazed that the many things that I have gone through, the ANGER, DEPRESSION and the feeling of just wanting to give up and let go have seemed to cease! I was reminded early on that these were some of the things that I would experience, of course I didn't think that I would, after all, I prepared for this JOURNEY long before the actual surgery that has now changed my life for the better and forever!

I know that I have said some very hurtful things to one of my closest friends, and yes, they have decided to back away for awhile, and maybe even forever although I hope not, but one thing I am so thankful for is that I know that they realize that it's a process and I have to process those emotions and feelings, I just hate that I lashed out at them, but, God knows my heart and He knows that I didn't intend or mean the words that were spoken and I hope they know as well. I hope that they know that I have deep sorrow in knowing that I have lashed out at the one that has loved and cared for me so much. This really isn't the place to say it, and I have said it directly to them, but I am again sincerely apologizing and asking for your foregiveness! Know that my heart is full of LOVE, CARING and GIVING, and all I want to do is first LOVE, CARE for and GIVE back to myself as well as LOVE, CARE for and GIVE my heart to YOU!

During this past couple of weeks I have asked God to help me deal with my ANGER issue, yes, I was angry at myself and once again, He hasn't failed me. I have had to battle with myself to forgive ME, but I finally realized that God gave me this second chance to become a healthier, happier ME, and finally I am ok and have moved on and looking forward to so many wonderful days full of good health, happiness and many many blessings!!!

As I stood and chatted with Gretchen and Cindy this afternoon, the more I began to share my experiences with them over the past five weeks, and let me tell you, I was a chatter box, I continued to hear myself say things that never really clicked before, but in our conversation, I spoke of so many small blessings that I never really thought about. Several times Gretchen looked at me and said "Tony, you have been blessed in so many ways!".

So let me just share with you what she was talking about......

* During my period of really having a hard time drinking the protien drinks, dealing with the ANGER and DEPRESSION, an old co-worker/friend just so happened to pop back into my life. Lisa had lapband surgery a year or so ago, she has been a great help in my dealing with the issues as well as sharing her experiences during her first couple of months post-op. Lisa shared with me that I am not crazy and that she too dealt with the ANGER and DEPRESSION! She told me to continue to process my feelings, that family and true, loyal friends will be there when it's all said and done. You never know when or who God will place in your life! Thank you Lisa!
* Most bariatric patients have issues with their food coming back up. Guess what, I have yet to throw my food back up. I have had a few episodes of discomfort from the food sitting in my chest, but let me tell you, I would rather deal with that for an hour than to have dry heaves and the discomfort and soreness for several days after.
* Most patients experience nausea. You guessed it, not me, I have had nausea one time and I believe it was from the drainage of my sinuses.
* My legs no longer swell and the pooling of blood in the back of my legs have almost disappeared completely. Several months ago during my original appointment to have the stress test, I was diagnosed with a condition that causes the flow of blood to flow one way and not both, causing pooling in the bottom of your legs just above the ankles. I was told that in a year I would need to have a stint placed in the bad vein to stop the pooling. Well, from the looks of my legs, that won't be necessary....PRAISING GOD in advance for a complete healing!!
* Patients that use a CPAP machine usually continue to use it for several months after surgery. Well, if you remember, I complained about that nagging machine that I became dependent on for so many years, the first week after surgery. I had it fixed and guess what, yep, I haven't used it since!!
* Remember me telling you about the knee replacement that I was now going to be able to have? Well, I have lost over 100lbs. since February 2009, and I no longer have any knee pain, stiffness, soreness or discomfort!! I will go back the first part of next year to have x-rays done, but I believe that I am healed!!
* Some of you may remember me talking about the pain and discomfort in my lower left back that would wake me in the early morning and also bother me during the day, especially when my bladder was full. No pain since surgery!! WOOHOO!

There are so many more things that I could mention, but just know that I am so thankful for the many blessings that God has seen fit to give me. When you walk in His presence and are obedient, He will sow many blessings upon you, sometimes they may seem overwhelming, but know that when He is happy with you, He commends you for your obedience!

As I focus on today, and such a beautiful day it is, I am reminded that LIFE is a JOURNEY, we all have to pass through it, so, I challenge each of you today, to make your LIFE'S JOURNEY a JOYOUS, HAPPY time. Make the best of every minute of every day! Remember to LOVE, CARE for and GIVE back to YOURSELF, once you take care of YOU, the rest is easy and you can then LOVE, CARE for and GIVE to someone else! Just remember to make our Father in Heaven a PRIORITY in YOUR LIFE JOURNEY!!

I challenge each of you today to do something kind for someone in need, whether it is to share a SMILE, a HUG, a hot meal to a homeless person or family in need, tell someone they look BEAUTIFUL or even a simple I LOVE YOU! You never know who's life you may touch by just a simple jesture!

Today I say, YOU are BEAUTIFUL and I LOVE each and everyone of YOU!!

Thank God today for all your BLESSINGS and continue to thank Him in advance for those that are in store for you!

Count your blessings. Once you realize how valuable you are and how much you have going for you, the smiles will return, the sun will break out, the music will play, and you will finally be able to move forward the life that God intended for you with grace, strength, courage, and confidence. ~Og Mandino

Today I THANK GOD for BLESSING my life with each of YOU!

Until the next post,

GOD SPEED!

Tony