Today I begin by saying a very SPECIAL THANK YOU to my primary care physician, Dr. Michael Munger, my psycologist, Dr. Ravi Sabapathy and my surgeon, Dr. Stanley Hoehn. The three of you have helped me to change my life for the better and there are no words meaningful enough to express my THANKFULNESS and APPRECIATION for your caring nature and concern about me and my health! THANK YOU!
DRUM ROLL PLEASE>>>>>>>
As of yesterday, Wednesday, January 13, 2010, my current weight, fully clothed(and I have to say I looked like a HANDSOME model out of the GQ magazine, HAHA! )- 276lbs
Weight loss total since February 20, 2009- 150lbs
Weight loss total since September 28, 2009(Surgery date)- 90lbs
So the title reads "Man in the mirror"...
Michael Jackson said it best:
I'm Gonna Make A Change,
For Once In My Life
It's Gonna Feel Real Good,
Gonna Make A Difference
Gonna Make It Right . . .
Those words have really settled into my soul. I have finally realized that my JOURNEY is not a dream, it's a reality and For Once In My Life, I have made a Change, a change that feels so good, it feels so right, it's a positive change that not only has made a difference in my life, but those that share it with me!
Many days I look in the mirror, usually after I come out of the shower(not a pretty site), but I see a drastic change in my physical appearance. Some days I tear up and wonder why, most days I smile and say to myself "YOU GO BOY!". Those days that I tear up and wonder WHY, I try to focus on the present and the future and not the past. I try very hard to live for that moment, and how great I feel, how good it feels to walk into JCPenney's or MACY'S and be able to purchase new clothes. Some of you may say to yourself, "why is that such a big deal?", well, it's a big deal to me because it has been years and I literally mean years since I was able to purchase a pair of jeans or a sweater from somewhere other than The Casual Male BIG & TALL store or HYROOPS BIG & TALL store.
The SMILE always gets BIGGER when I step in front of the mirror after a shower, a freshly shaved face and all the other necessities that take place, and I am fully dressed. I no longer fill up the mirror's edges, I can actually see what's behind me now from the sides, HAHA, what we take for granted! I find myself lately, adjusting my clothes so they look just right, yesterday I laughed at myself, why?, you ask... HAHA, I POPPED MY COLLAR!! LOL!! I guess you can say I was feeling very confident, some might say I was feeling myself, but whatever the case may be, I FELT GOOD ABOUT WHAT I SAW IN THE MIRROR!!
Yesterday I had a doctor's appointment, and just to share with you how good I am starting to feel about myself, my attire was something different from my usual attire. See, usually I would go to the doctor in shorts and a t-shirt in the warmer months, sweats and t-shirt in the colder months, but yesterday, as my wife's cousin LeeLee would say, I WAS CLEAN AS PETEY GREEN!!
When I walked into the office, the scheduling lady happened to come out of her office to grab a bottle of water, she took a double take at me sitting there and she said with a big smile on her face and in a high pitched voice, "Tony! YOU LOOK GOOD!". Do you know how good that feels to be complimented on? It's exciting, but at the same time, your mind begins to wonder back to the past, you wonder what did people think of you and your appearance before!
Oh well, at this point in my life, it no longer matter's what people thought of me in the past, what's important now, is how I feel and look today and what the future holds for me!
Yesterday was a GREAT day! My doctor complimented me as well, he told me that the v-neck Chaps vest and white mock turtle neck I had on, fit me well and it looked great on me, he even pointed out that he had never seen me in slacks, dress shoes and shirt, his words went something like this... with a glowing smile on his face "VERY NICE TONY!".
Prior to my doctor's appointment, I went to KU Medical Center to visit a dear family member who is fighting for his life. As I stood next to him, I heard a sequence of very soft words come from his mouth. I didn't quite make out what he said, so I asked him again and very softly with a smile on his face and shaking his head in the manner of yes, he said "You are looking really good". WOW, this man is very very weak and most times doesn't say much if anything at all, but he found enough strength to compliment me! Thank you Uncle Arthur for noticing the new me and finding the strength to tell me!!
Friends, this is all new to me and I will tell you that it is an AWESOME feeling to be noticed by so many! I never really realized how large of a man I was until now, something as simple as receiving a hug and the person exchanging the hug saying "WOW, my arms actually go around you now!" So many little things that I never thought I would be able to ever do again, I can now do, for instance, leaning over when sitting in a chair and having a set of thighs to relax my arms on, crossing my leg and placing it on top of my knee, bending over and tying my shoes, looking down and actually seeing my feet, sitting in a booth comfortably at a restaurant. It's the little things that I am so thankful for!
One thing that I want each of you to know is this, I may be shrinking from an outwardly or physical appearance, but the size of my HEART will NEVER shrink!!!
So, as I continue to look in the mirror, I will continue to change for the better, but more importantly, my years have now and will continue to be extended so that I can continue to share with each of you my blessings and my new life!
Thank you for standing by my side through my JOURNEY. A few of you have been through HELL with me the past year, especially the past 3-1/2 or 4 months, you know who you are, and I want you to know that without your persistence in caring and loving me, I'm not sure where I would be at this point in my JOURNEY, so THANK YOU for holding on and taking the ride, it's not over, but it sure is getting to be a whole lot smoother, I've got a new set of struts and shocks on this new life of mine!!
As I close this entry, please pray for Uncle Arthur Burns, pray that God's will be done and that His peace, love, grace and mercy be placed upon him and the family.
Continue to pray for cousin Jill!
Also pray for the people of Haiti.
Please pray for the many people that are battling cancer, pray for peace over the loved ones of those who have lost their battle of this horrible disease!
Also, I would ask that you keep a new found friend in prayer as well, Leslie is embarking upon her new life's journey, pray for her peace of mind and strength to succeed, Leslie, you can do it!
DRUM ROLL PLEASE>>>>>>>
As of yesterday, Wednesday, January 13, 2010, my current weight, fully clothed(and I have to say I looked like a HANDSOME model out of the GQ magazine, HAHA! )- 276lbs
Weight loss total since February 20, 2009- 150lbs
Weight loss total since September 28, 2009(Surgery date)- 90lbs
So the title reads "Man in the mirror"...
Michael Jackson said it best:
I'm Gonna Make A Change,
For Once In My Life
It's Gonna Feel Real Good,
Gonna Make A Difference
Gonna Make It Right . . .
Those words have really settled into my soul. I have finally realized that my JOURNEY is not a dream, it's a reality and For Once In My Life, I have made a Change, a change that feels so good, it feels so right, it's a positive change that not only has made a difference in my life, but those that share it with me!
Many days I look in the mirror, usually after I come out of the shower(not a pretty site), but I see a drastic change in my physical appearance. Some days I tear up and wonder why, most days I smile and say to myself "YOU GO BOY!". Those days that I tear up and wonder WHY, I try to focus on the present and the future and not the past. I try very hard to live for that moment, and how great I feel, how good it feels to walk into JCPenney's or MACY'S and be able to purchase new clothes. Some of you may say to yourself, "why is that such a big deal?", well, it's a big deal to me because it has been years and I literally mean years since I was able to purchase a pair of jeans or a sweater from somewhere other than The Casual Male BIG & TALL store or HYROOPS BIG & TALL store.
The SMILE always gets BIGGER when I step in front of the mirror after a shower, a freshly shaved face and all the other necessities that take place, and I am fully dressed. I no longer fill up the mirror's edges, I can actually see what's behind me now from the sides, HAHA, what we take for granted! I find myself lately, adjusting my clothes so they look just right, yesterday I laughed at myself, why?, you ask... HAHA, I POPPED MY COLLAR!! LOL!! I guess you can say I was feeling very confident, some might say I was feeling myself, but whatever the case may be, I FELT GOOD ABOUT WHAT I SAW IN THE MIRROR!!
Yesterday I had a doctor's appointment, and just to share with you how good I am starting to feel about myself, my attire was something different from my usual attire. See, usually I would go to the doctor in shorts and a t-shirt in the warmer months, sweats and t-shirt in the colder months, but yesterday, as my wife's cousin LeeLee would say, I WAS CLEAN AS PETEY GREEN!!
When I walked into the office, the scheduling lady happened to come out of her office to grab a bottle of water, she took a double take at me sitting there and she said with a big smile on her face and in a high pitched voice, "Tony! YOU LOOK GOOD!". Do you know how good that feels to be complimented on? It's exciting, but at the same time, your mind begins to wonder back to the past, you wonder what did people think of you and your appearance before!
Oh well, at this point in my life, it no longer matter's what people thought of me in the past, what's important now, is how I feel and look today and what the future holds for me!
Yesterday was a GREAT day! My doctor complimented me as well, he told me that the v-neck Chaps vest and white mock turtle neck I had on, fit me well and it looked great on me, he even pointed out that he had never seen me in slacks, dress shoes and shirt, his words went something like this... with a glowing smile on his face "VERY NICE TONY!".
Prior to my doctor's appointment, I went to KU Medical Center to visit a dear family member who is fighting for his life. As I stood next to him, I heard a sequence of very soft words come from his mouth. I didn't quite make out what he said, so I asked him again and very softly with a smile on his face and shaking his head in the manner of yes, he said "You are looking really good". WOW, this man is very very weak and most times doesn't say much if anything at all, but he found enough strength to compliment me! Thank you Uncle Arthur for noticing the new me and finding the strength to tell me!!
Friends, this is all new to me and I will tell you that it is an AWESOME feeling to be noticed by so many! I never really realized how large of a man I was until now, something as simple as receiving a hug and the person exchanging the hug saying "WOW, my arms actually go around you now!" So many little things that I never thought I would be able to ever do again, I can now do, for instance, leaning over when sitting in a chair and having a set of thighs to relax my arms on, crossing my leg and placing it on top of my knee, bending over and tying my shoes, looking down and actually seeing my feet, sitting in a booth comfortably at a restaurant. It's the little things that I am so thankful for!
One thing that I want each of you to know is this, I may be shrinking from an outwardly or physical appearance, but the size of my HEART will NEVER shrink!!!
So, as I continue to look in the mirror, I will continue to change for the better, but more importantly, my years have now and will continue to be extended so that I can continue to share with each of you my blessings and my new life!
Thank you for standing by my side through my JOURNEY. A few of you have been through HELL with me the past year, especially the past 3-1/2 or 4 months, you know who you are, and I want you to know that without your persistence in caring and loving me, I'm not sure where I would be at this point in my JOURNEY, so THANK YOU for holding on and taking the ride, it's not over, but it sure is getting to be a whole lot smoother, I've got a new set of struts and shocks on this new life of mine!!
As I close this entry, please pray for Uncle Arthur Burns, pray that God's will be done and that His peace, love, grace and mercy be placed upon him and the family.
Continue to pray for cousin Jill!
Also pray for the people of Haiti.
Please pray for the many people that are battling cancer, pray for peace over the loved ones of those who have lost their battle of this horrible disease!
Also, I would ask that you keep a new found friend in prayer as well, Leslie is embarking upon her new life's journey, pray for her peace of mind and strength to succeed, Leslie, you can do it!
Lastly, I would ask that each of you pray for HAPPINESS and PEACE in each other's lives!
Know that my heart is filled with JOY that each of you continue with me on my JOURNEY, you mean the world to me!
As I always remind you......
YOU ARE #1 IN YOUR LIFE!
Take care of yourself first so that you are able to take care of those around you that need your love and care!
The year ahead is a new season, it's a new day, and there's a fresh anointing flowing our way! Let's open our hearts and let God fill our spirit with His LOVE, His PEACE and His GRACE and MERCY!
NIV - Psalm 16:11 You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.
Tell someone you LOVE them today, you never know, it might be what gets them through the day!
Until the next post,
GOD SPEED
I LOVE YOU!
Tony
GOD SPEED
I LOVE YOU!
Tony
2 comments:
Tony I am so proud of you...You look great and no way will that Heart of yours every shrink. I tell everyone about my cousin Tony all the time and how although I was worried about you having the surgery I am so happy that it all has worked out well for you. I cried reading this and as I got to the end I cried even more and even harder. That you so much cousin for all your love and support and you keep sending up those prayers for my grandad. I'm so happy he got to see you and even happier he talked to you. I'm sure if he could hug you he would have. LOVE YOU SO MUCH COUSIN!! keep up the good work. May God continue to Bless you.
Dee Burns
You're looking great, Tony! My, oh my, how you've changed since I saw you last! wow! I mean WOW! Hang in there, hon, and keep on keepin on
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